Nothing good ever comes out of Texas, except BBQ sauce.
Saturday, December 25, 2004
MY GROWN-UP CHRISTMAS LIST
Since my previous wishes didn't come true, I figured it was okay for me to ask for something else. From the heart of one of my greatest inspirations... this is what I want for Christmas this year.
Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee.
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies.
Well, I'm all grown up now,
But I still need help somehow.
I'm not a child,
but my heart still can dream.
So, here's my lifelong wish;
My grown-up Christmas list.
Not for myself, but for a world in need.
No more lives torn apart,
And wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
Everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end...
This is my grown-up Christmas list.
As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely wrapped beneath the tree.
Well heaven surely knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal a hurting human soul.
No more lives torn apart,
And wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
Everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end...
This is my grown-up Christmas list.
What is this illusion called the innocence of youth?
Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth!
There'd be...
No more lives torn apart,
And wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
Everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end...
This is my grown-up Christmas list.
This is my only lifelong wish...
This is my Grown-up Christmas List.
Thanks, Amy Grant, for putting into words what I feel.
Since my previous wishes didn't come true, I figured it was okay for me to ask for something else. From the heart of one of my greatest inspirations... this is what I want for Christmas this year.
Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee.
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies.
Well, I'm all grown up now,
But I still need help somehow.
I'm not a child,
but my heart still can dream.
So, here's my lifelong wish;
My grown-up Christmas list.
Not for myself, but for a world in need.
No more lives torn apart,
And wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
Everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end...
This is my grown-up Christmas list.
As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely wrapped beneath the tree.
Well heaven surely knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal a hurting human soul.
No more lives torn apart,
And wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
Everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end...
This is my grown-up Christmas list.
What is this illusion called the innocence of youth?
Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth!
There'd be...
No more lives torn apart,
And wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
Everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end...
This is my grown-up Christmas list.
This is my only lifelong wish...
This is my Grown-up Christmas List.
Thanks, Amy Grant, for putting into words what I feel.
Monday, December 20, 2004
What a LAME day!
I drove back and forth between my house and the ELA Courthouse because first the judge decided to recess for the whole morning. Then we finally reported back after our "extended lunch break" only to find out that the lawyers on both side decided to just settle so as to not let the case interfere with their X-mas vacations! How LAZY!!! It's a good thing I live close and drive fast!
After that anti-climatical end to my jury duty, the only thing that I was looking forward to was the Lakers game. I still can't believe they lost... to the Grizzlies! What an ugly game played by BOTH teams. And what the f.ck are the Dodgers doing? No Brad Penny, no Shawn Green, no Steve Finley, no Adrian Beltre, no Alex Cora??? No SportsCenter for me tonight!
I drove back and forth between my house and the ELA Courthouse because first the judge decided to recess for the whole morning. Then we finally reported back after our "extended lunch break" only to find out that the lawyers on both side decided to just settle so as to not let the case interfere with their X-mas vacations! How LAZY!!! It's a good thing I live close and drive fast!
After that anti-climatical end to my jury duty, the only thing that I was looking forward to was the Lakers game. I still can't believe they lost... to the Grizzlies! What an ugly game played by BOTH teams. And what the f.ck are the Dodgers doing? No Brad Penny, no Shawn Green, no Steve Finley, no Adrian Beltre, no Alex Cora??? No SportsCenter for me tonight!
Sunday, December 19, 2004
THINK POSITIVE
Being at home and around my brother and his friends, I am always so motivated to inspire them to use their energy and time towards positive things. Here is a group of such bright young boys, yet they're so lazy! All their parents (mine included) work so much that they don't have time to give them the amount of attention they need. Furthermore, they lack good, older role models. The current losers they look up to bum around and smoke all the damn time. Granted, I'm not the most ideal "cool" older person they need right now, but I do hope that my influence in their lives will be beneficial to them for the time being. In the two days that I've been around them, I've managed to gain a bit of respect and they actually enjoy listening to my corny stories... often equipped with a life lesson to be learned at the end. In the upcoming weeks, I hope to be able to engage them in more conversations and help them come up with a plan to get them to where they want to be in the future. The hardest part about it all is trying to figure out where to take them so that our mini-field trips can be educational and fun. So far, what I have planned include visits to the Getty Museum, the Museum of Tolerance and a biology expo. I really believe that they WANT to succeed. The problem is they don't know how. I have a terrible feeling that teachers look at them and think that they are lost causes cuz they look like a bunch of hooligans. Though they sometimes do... they're far from it. In fact, on their own, they engage in some very thought-provoking conversations. My challenge will be to strip the laziness away and be able to transform them so that others can see the great potential that I see in them.
My time with the boys will be a great preview for what's in store for me with Teach for America. I just found out yesterday that I will be a teacher next year! I'm very excited to find out where I will be placed and what subject and grade level I will be teaching. If I'm successful with the boys, hopefully it'll prepare me just a bit more in becoming a great teacher.
But for now... it's bedtime. Tomorrow, I must report bright and early at 9:30 sharp for my first-ever call to jury duty at the East LA Courthouse. I'm actually really stoked! As a HUGE fan of the movie, 12 Angry Men, I hope to be placed on the case and be the voice of reason in the deliberation room. However, I'm a little concerned that once I proclaim my Berkeley-ness and/or my soon-to-be degrees in Political Science and Sociology, they'll dismiss me from the jury panel for sure. Add my aspirations to attend Law School, and I'm definitely a goner. I'm thinking I may say that I'm a sorority girl from Rio Hondo and that I'm a Mass Communications major. But then again... perjury's not cool either.
Being at home and around my brother and his friends, I am always so motivated to inspire them to use their energy and time towards positive things. Here is a group of such bright young boys, yet they're so lazy! All their parents (mine included) work so much that they don't have time to give them the amount of attention they need. Furthermore, they lack good, older role models. The current losers they look up to bum around and smoke all the damn time. Granted, I'm not the most ideal "cool" older person they need right now, but I do hope that my influence in their lives will be beneficial to them for the time being. In the two days that I've been around them, I've managed to gain a bit of respect and they actually enjoy listening to my corny stories... often equipped with a life lesson to be learned at the end. In the upcoming weeks, I hope to be able to engage them in more conversations and help them come up with a plan to get them to where they want to be in the future. The hardest part about it all is trying to figure out where to take them so that our mini-field trips can be educational and fun. So far, what I have planned include visits to the Getty Museum, the Museum of Tolerance and a biology expo. I really believe that they WANT to succeed. The problem is they don't know how. I have a terrible feeling that teachers look at them and think that they are lost causes cuz they look like a bunch of hooligans. Though they sometimes do... they're far from it. In fact, on their own, they engage in some very thought-provoking conversations. My challenge will be to strip the laziness away and be able to transform them so that others can see the great potential that I see in them.
My time with the boys will be a great preview for what's in store for me with Teach for America. I just found out yesterday that I will be a teacher next year! I'm very excited to find out where I will be placed and what subject and grade level I will be teaching. If I'm successful with the boys, hopefully it'll prepare me just a bit more in becoming a great teacher.
But for now... it's bedtime. Tomorrow, I must report bright and early at 9:30 sharp for my first-ever call to jury duty at the East LA Courthouse. I'm actually really stoked! As a HUGE fan of the movie, 12 Angry Men, I hope to be placed on the case and be the voice of reason in the deliberation room. However, I'm a little concerned that once I proclaim my Berkeley-ness and/or my soon-to-be degrees in Political Science and Sociology, they'll dismiss me from the jury panel for sure. Add my aspirations to attend Law School, and I'm definitely a goner. I'm thinking I may say that I'm a sorority girl from Rio Hondo and that I'm a Mass Communications major. But then again... perjury's not cool either.
Friday, December 17, 2004
8 F.CKING HOURS...
...was the number of hours it took me to drive home today. I usually LOVE driving down the 5 freeway. However, considering that this is a drive that I can usually make in 5.5 hours, I am f.cking pissed! I don't normally get steaming mad about anything, but today, I'm BOILING at 100 degrees Celsius.
First of all, who gave big rigs the right to drive at 50 mph in the LEFT lane??? If I recall correctly, all signs read, "Slower traffic keep right." It's a simple concept... what's not to understand? If you're big and slow, just stay on your lane. Don't try to race with the big boys. But nooooo, instead, I got stuck behind all the f.cking truckers and the lame-ass drivers that were blocking up both lanes.
Secondly, there was fog. But fog's usually not too troublesome. Tonight, it was dense, but not to the point of being unable to see clearly. Yet, the f.cking people on the road tonight could not drive for sh.t! The 5 freeway going through Republican Land is STRAIGHT! It's not scary to drive STRAIGHT with a bit of fog. Just follow the f.cking taillights of the car in front of you. No need to go at the speed of a f.cking snail!
But perhaps the worst part of it all was the state patroller that STOPPED traffic in the middle of the 5 freeway and then proceeded to make us go at his pace, weaving back and forth in front of us with a flashing sign that read, "Drive at this pace, do not pass." I happened to be the third car in the pack. His pace? 40 mph in a 70 mph speed zone! This went on for an hour before the f.cker finally got off the exit at Kettleman.
It wasn't even like bumper-to-bumper TRAFFIC. It was just a bunch of cars that didn't know how to drive. Ironically, things FINALLY got better the second I saw the sign proclaiming that I had just reached the county limits of Los Angeles. Thank goodness for good ol' LA drivers. At this point, I was so sick of traffic that I think I basically flew home going about 100. (Shhh... Gabbo says I drive like an East LA boy.) Needless to say, my road rage was in overdrive, to the point of just wanting to run my car off the road. I can't believe how frustrating it was on the road today... especially cuz I was starving and alone. And believe me, I was UNFORGIVING with the horn.
Preach on, Luda. Move bitch, get out the way cuz you about to get ran the F.CK over.
...was the number of hours it took me to drive home today. I usually LOVE driving down the 5 freeway. However, considering that this is a drive that I can usually make in 5.5 hours, I am f.cking pissed! I don't normally get steaming mad about anything, but today, I'm BOILING at 100 degrees Celsius.
First of all, who gave big rigs the right to drive at 50 mph in the LEFT lane??? If I recall correctly, all signs read, "Slower traffic keep right." It's a simple concept... what's not to understand? If you're big and slow, just stay on your lane. Don't try to race with the big boys. But nooooo, instead, I got stuck behind all the f.cking truckers and the lame-ass drivers that were blocking up both lanes.
Secondly, there was fog. But fog's usually not too troublesome. Tonight, it was dense, but not to the point of being unable to see clearly. Yet, the f.cking people on the road tonight could not drive for sh.t! The 5 freeway going through Republican Land is STRAIGHT! It's not scary to drive STRAIGHT with a bit of fog. Just follow the f.cking taillights of the car in front of you. No need to go at the speed of a f.cking snail!
But perhaps the worst part of it all was the state patroller that STOPPED traffic in the middle of the 5 freeway and then proceeded to make us go at his pace, weaving back and forth in front of us with a flashing sign that read, "Drive at this pace, do not pass." I happened to be the third car in the pack. His pace? 40 mph in a 70 mph speed zone! This went on for an hour before the f.cker finally got off the exit at Kettleman.
It wasn't even like bumper-to-bumper TRAFFIC. It was just a bunch of cars that didn't know how to drive. Ironically, things FINALLY got better the second I saw the sign proclaiming that I had just reached the county limits of Los Angeles. Thank goodness for good ol' LA drivers. At this point, I was so sick of traffic that I think I basically flew home going about 100. (Shhh... Gabbo says I drive like an East LA boy.) Needless to say, my road rage was in overdrive, to the point of just wanting to run my car off the road. I can't believe how frustrating it was on the road today... especially cuz I was starving and alone. And believe me, I was UNFORGIVING with the horn.
Preach on, Luda. Move bitch, get out the way cuz you about to get ran the F.CK over.
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
BASKETBALL DIARIES
As the weather gets cold, I get gimpy... lately, my ankle has been killing me! It was so bad today that I limped the whole 13 blocks home. It's the same ankle where I had a third degree tendon tear from a long time ago. I was supposed to be MIA for about 2 months after it happened. But at age 13 and dreaming about going into the NBA, I thought I was invincible. I think I stayed off my ankle for about 2 WEEKS! And now I'm paying the consequences. But whatever, it's like a battle scar and I cherish it and the memory dearly...
I had been going one-on-one with this guy, JB. He didn't think I could beat him in basketball. The score was 10-1, my lead. On my last point, I thought I'd get a little fancy and do a crazy crossover and hopefully break some ankles. Unfortunately, the only ankles that got "broken" that day were mine. I slipped on a puddle of water due to the rainy weather that day and ate it on the hardwood floor. I don't remember it hurting very much, though it swelled about five times my regular ankle size. It was so horrible looking that it made my mother cry, and she never cries. Needless to say, I never did get to finish that game... but we can reasonably infer that I won. :)
As an aside, I got my crap paper back today. The professor gave me an A. An A?!?!?! The one that I wrote in a rush so that I could go mingle with some hot boys?! I almost wanted to tell her to change it because I didn't deserve that high of a grade. Almost.
As the weather gets cold, I get gimpy... lately, my ankle has been killing me! It was so bad today that I limped the whole 13 blocks home. It's the same ankle where I had a third degree tendon tear from a long time ago. I was supposed to be MIA for about 2 months after it happened. But at age 13 and dreaming about going into the NBA, I thought I was invincible. I think I stayed off my ankle for about 2 WEEKS! And now I'm paying the consequences. But whatever, it's like a battle scar and I cherish it and the memory dearly...
I had been going one-on-one with this guy, JB. He didn't think I could beat him in basketball. The score was 10-1, my lead. On my last point, I thought I'd get a little fancy and do a crazy crossover and hopefully break some ankles. Unfortunately, the only ankles that got "broken" that day were mine. I slipped on a puddle of water due to the rainy weather that day and ate it on the hardwood floor. I don't remember it hurting very much, though it swelled about five times my regular ankle size. It was so horrible looking that it made my mother cry, and she never cries. Needless to say, I never did get to finish that game... but we can reasonably infer that I won. :)
As an aside, I got my crap paper back today. The professor gave me an A. An A?!?!?! The one that I wrote in a rush so that I could go mingle with some hot boys?! I almost wanted to tell her to change it because I didn't deserve that high of a grade. Almost.
Sunday, December 12, 2004
DEAR SANTA
'Twas the night before finals, but instead of studying, visions of Lakers tickets dance in my head... I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out how I'm going to get those coveted Lakers/Heat Christmas day tickets. There was once a point in my life when I was hooked up for all Laker home games, via the help of a former president by the name of Gerald Ford, AKA Jimmy Carter. Oh how I miss those 11th row courtside seats in front of Vanessa Williams. (I was spoiled rotten!) But as basketball season came to an end last year, so did my conversations with him. Hmmm... may it be time to rekindle old ties? Needless to say, I'm pretty desperate for some tickets. I'm dying to see Kobe in action again.
'Twas the night before finals, but instead of studying, visions of Lakers tickets dance in my head... I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out how I'm going to get those coveted Lakers/Heat Christmas day tickets. There was once a point in my life when I was hooked up for all Laker home games, via the help of a former president by the name of Gerald Ford, AKA Jimmy Carter. Oh how I miss those 11th row courtside seats in front of Vanessa Williams. (I was spoiled rotten!) But as basketball season came to an end last year, so did my conversations with him. Hmmm... may it be time to rekindle old ties? Needless to say, I'm pretty desperate for some tickets. I'm dying to see Kobe in action again.
LIFE CHANCES
Maybe I should get off my soapbox, but I am starting to believe that my Auntie and Uncle, as two former educators, have failed miserably in teaching. As my four-year education here at Cal comes slowly to a close, I have been met with pressures from all sides to continue with my schooling either at grad school or law school instead of taking a two-year hiatus. Even after I told my parents what I intend to do with my two years away from school, they try to hint, in any way possible, about all their wonderful friends' children that have already received acceptance to prestigous graduate programs. My latest critique comes from my Auntie and Uncle, whom proceeded to give my father the third degree as to why I would want to leave schooling to teach "those" kids. Both of them claim that "bad kids just aren't worth the heartache, so don't try so hard and you'll both be better off." With all due respect, those two are exactly what is wrong with the education system today!
It breaks my heart to think that my parents have been so brainwashed that they can't even hold their heads up high and proudly proclaim that their daughter wants to take time off to give back to her community and teach inner-city students. Because of all the negative connotations that come with putting one's education on hold, my parents must fidget about as they shamefully tell others that I want to use my Berkeley degree to be a teacher. It saddens me to know that choosing teaching as a profession is not looked upon with more respect. But the worst part is trying to get my parents to understand that going straight to graduate school isn't part of the plan for me... not at all. And that's OKAY. Going straight into grad school isn't for EVERYBODY. Frankly, I refuse to be like some of the losers from my class that can regurgitate information presented by the professor or from a book but have one heck of a time applying the same knowledge to real-life experiences. I say, give me the experiences. That'll beat your 4.0 GPA anyday.
Maybe I should get off my soapbox, but I am starting to believe that my Auntie and Uncle, as two former educators, have failed miserably in teaching. As my four-year education here at Cal comes slowly to a close, I have been met with pressures from all sides to continue with my schooling either at grad school or law school instead of taking a two-year hiatus. Even after I told my parents what I intend to do with my two years away from school, they try to hint, in any way possible, about all their wonderful friends' children that have already received acceptance to prestigous graduate programs. My latest critique comes from my Auntie and Uncle, whom proceeded to give my father the third degree as to why I would want to leave schooling to teach "those" kids. Both of them claim that "bad kids just aren't worth the heartache, so don't try so hard and you'll both be better off." With all due respect, those two are exactly what is wrong with the education system today!
It breaks my heart to think that my parents have been so brainwashed that they can't even hold their heads up high and proudly proclaim that their daughter wants to take time off to give back to her community and teach inner-city students. Because of all the negative connotations that come with putting one's education on hold, my parents must fidget about as they shamefully tell others that I want to use my Berkeley degree to be a teacher. It saddens me to know that choosing teaching as a profession is not looked upon with more respect. But the worst part is trying to get my parents to understand that going straight to graduate school isn't part of the plan for me... not at all. And that's OKAY. Going straight into grad school isn't for EVERYBODY. Frankly, I refuse to be like some of the losers from my class that can regurgitate information presented by the professor or from a book but have one heck of a time applying the same knowledge to real-life experiences. I say, give me the experiences. That'll beat your 4.0 GPA anyday.
Saturday, December 11, 2004
FOUR YEARS LATER...
The Priestley Clan
Derek was highly intrigued with his chocolate fondue.
The Boys
The Girls
It's a bit scary to see how much we've all aged. I guess Berkeley tends to do that to people. However, there's nothing like being with old friends. There are just some things that only they will ever truly know about me. Thanks for being there through the good and the bad. I can't believe next semester, I will be without Gabbo and Teresa.
The Priestley Clan
Derek was highly intrigued with his chocolate fondue.
The Boys
The Girls
It's a bit scary to see how much we've all aged. I guess Berkeley tends to do that to people. However, there's nothing like being with old friends. There are just some things that only they will ever truly know about me. Thanks for being there through the good and the bad. I can't believe next semester, I will be without Gabbo and Teresa.
Monday, December 06, 2004
STRESS, BE GONE
Wow, what has gotten into me lately? I find myself stressing about the littlest things. It's JUST a paper... it's be okay, Jamie. I promise. When did I start taking myself so seriously??? I've learned there's a difference between taking ONESELF seriously and taking THINGS seriously. Kris always tells me that it's important to get your sh.t done, but don't think you're the only one that has it the worst. It'll all get done... it has to... so it will.
I think I've also been especially moody because I haven't had very much good food lately. The post-Thanksgiving period is always the hardest. Your stomach has just gotten used to eating fabulous home-cooked meals and all of a sudden, it's stripped away. You're back at school and smack-dab in the middle of finals season with little to nothing to eat. Today, to alleviate my hunger pains, I had a disgustingly large Double Whopper (hold the mayo and onions) from Burger King. Forget regular-sized, I went jumbo. The guy ordering after me was a little shocked, asking me, "All that for... YOU???" Yes, sir, ALL FOR ME. Hey, sometimes, a gal just needs a burger. Obey the stomach and the body will do you good... cuz I'm feeling GOOD right now.
Wow, what has gotten into me lately? I find myself stressing about the littlest things. It's JUST a paper... it's be okay, Jamie. I promise. When did I start taking myself so seriously??? I've learned there's a difference between taking ONESELF seriously and taking THINGS seriously. Kris always tells me that it's important to get your sh.t done, but don't think you're the only one that has it the worst. It'll all get done... it has to... so it will.
I think I've also been especially moody because I haven't had very much good food lately. The post-Thanksgiving period is always the hardest. Your stomach has just gotten used to eating fabulous home-cooked meals and all of a sudden, it's stripped away. You're back at school and smack-dab in the middle of finals season with little to nothing to eat. Today, to alleviate my hunger pains, I had a disgustingly large Double Whopper (hold the mayo and onions) from Burger King. Forget regular-sized, I went jumbo. The guy ordering after me was a little shocked, asking me, "All that for... YOU???" Yes, sir, ALL FOR ME. Hey, sometimes, a gal just needs a burger. Obey the stomach and the body will do you good... cuz I'm feeling GOOD right now.
Friday, December 03, 2004
Dear "Bad Boy",
It's been awhile since I last wrote to you here in my blog. I used to think this my blog was safe from your eyes, but now I'm not so sure anymore. Either way, you confuse me just the same. I can't believe it's been 4 years since I've met you... and in a few short months, we will both be graduating. It's ironic to think about the random moments we have shared and the evolution of our friendship. It's a little disappointing to think that, come May, our paths may diverge forever. Will we keep in touch? My guess is probably no... but that's really your call. Maybe when you finally get over your "frat boy phrase," you'll realize how great things can be.
I won't lie. My roommates don't like you. My friends all tell me you're disgusting. But for some crazy reason, that hasn't fazed me. Believe me, there was a point that I tried to shut out all feelings that I had for you. Unfortunately, that hasn't worked, because like Keali'i Reichel sings, "Every road leads back to you." Trust me on this one, we run in the same circles. We have too many friends in common. This is why I've given up on dating Berkeley guys - THEY ALL END UP BEING ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS! But at the end of the night, you're the one I really want to take home. Why don't you share the same feelings as your friends about me? Or maybe you do? And this is all just a game. If that's the case, stop playing. You win. But do me a favor, don't keep my heart in limbo anymore.
Love,
Jamie
It's been awhile since I last wrote to you here in my blog. I used to think this my blog was safe from your eyes, but now I'm not so sure anymore. Either way, you confuse me just the same. I can't believe it's been 4 years since I've met you... and in a few short months, we will both be graduating. It's ironic to think about the random moments we have shared and the evolution of our friendship. It's a little disappointing to think that, come May, our paths may diverge forever. Will we keep in touch? My guess is probably no... but that's really your call. Maybe when you finally get over your "frat boy phrase," you'll realize how great things can be.
I won't lie. My roommates don't like you. My friends all tell me you're disgusting. But for some crazy reason, that hasn't fazed me. Believe me, there was a point that I tried to shut out all feelings that I had for you. Unfortunately, that hasn't worked, because like Keali'i Reichel sings, "Every road leads back to you." Trust me on this one, we run in the same circles. We have too many friends in common. This is why I've given up on dating Berkeley guys - THEY ALL END UP BEING ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS! But at the end of the night, you're the one I really want to take home. Why don't you share the same feelings as your friends about me? Or maybe you do? And this is all just a game. If that's the case, stop playing. You win. But do me a favor, don't keep my heart in limbo anymore.
Love,
Jamie
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)