I want my children to be humanitarians!!! Saving the world one country at a time is cool...

PLANET ROCK THE BLOCK AND OPEN RICE

There's always an "up" when you're down... as my roommates constantly try to teach me, and as I constantly try to teach myself, things always end up working out in the end. Ben managed to pump some fun back into me. Went to Planet Rock the Block, hosted by Superb (Elliot's awesome!). Lots of good hip-hop music, graffiti, and break-dancers.

After that, we jumped into Eshleman for Open Rice. Quite entertaining, a bunch of random talent acts, including a strip-tease, Luca-style. Highlight of the night: David Ross (Mr. Speech Man) played a song that he wrote on the guitar... dedicated to me! (Of course he was just trying to be funny and happened to choose me as a focal point cuz he knows me.)

The night ended with Steve's Korean BBQ (aiii... so unfaithful to Mama Ghet's home-cookin'). Jerry finally saw our apartment... not nearly as chic as his bachelor's pad, but our place is nice... it's really growing on me. (But the penthouse would be sooo sweet!!!!)

I'M JUST A SIMPLE GIRL WITH OCCASIONAL TENDENCIES TO TRY TO SAVE THE WORLD...

Sometimes, I feel like the bastard child of OP... no idea what I'm doing, no idea what's going on. Is there some sort of blacklist that I'm on that I don't know about??? It seems like the higher a person gets on the hierarchy of politics here at Cal, the more likely they'll try to avoid me in passing. Maybe people like me don't truly exist, but is it really THAT impossible to believe that I do things for the pureness of my heart and not because I have some sort of ulterior motive? Or have I just fallen into the black hole of politicians? I wish for nothing more this semester than to get through it as a "regular student." I don't want to HAVE to "look presentable" all the time anymore. I would like more than anything to be able to walk to class in my sweats and not feel like I'm being put on display. Everyday, all I try to do is to be a good person and help my school anyway I can. And as cheesy and that sounds, it's true. The only reason why I even re-applied to be back in OP is so that I can make a difference and help better the campus community, and who knows, maybe even save the world while I'm at it. So why am I being attacked? So, for the last time, here's the absolute truth...

1. NO, I'M NOT TRYING TO "STEAL" INTERNS AWAY FROM ANYBODY!
2. AM I THINKING ABOUT RUNNING FOR OFFICE NEXT SEMESTER? HELL NO!
3. IS KRIS RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT AGAIN? I DON'T KNOW!!!!!!

Can I finally go back to being a regular college student without people always trying to be defensive when they speak to me? THERE ARE NO ULTERIOR MOTIVES WHATSOEVER! I don't "network" and I don't do shady back-room deals!

When did I become so hardened by life? Veronica's right, I'm not the same happy-go-lucky Jamie that I once was in high school. I've seen how dark and cold people's hearts can be. It makes me so sad to think that these are the people that run our government (both school and society). I'M NOT THE POLITICIAN HERE!!!! It's not what I'm about, it's not what I want to spend the rest of my life doing. Every so often, I'll do something whole-heartedly, simply because I believe in the cause, not because I'm looking for that golden prize behind it. I'm a good person, and my heart is pure....

OTHER REASONS WHY TODAY SUCKS LIKE NO OTHER:
1. Tried to do the laundry and fought with the washer and dryer.
2. My lavender comforter and sheets are now tie-dyed with blue specks because of wretched washer.
3. Star Buddy is now more blue than the last time I washed it.
4. Sat naked on my bed for 5 minutes trying to find a decent shirt.
5. Cut my arm on a hanger while trying to look for a shirt.
6. Ran a block to chase after a bus... bus drove off with me cursing behind it.
7. Waited another 15 minutes for a damn bus.
8. Ended up sitting next to some fat chick who reeked of alcohol.
9. Fat chick breathed all over me.
10. Got stuck behind another fat person after I got off the bus. (Big day for fat people.)
11. Dude was big like there was no tomorrow... couldn't get around him.
12. Dude lit up a cigarette... I hacked all the way over to Dwinelle.
13. Lowlifes at the corner calling out, "Looking good, Little Mama."
14. Had to break GT2 date with Ben cuz I can't get my life together.
15. It is now 4:19pm, and I still have not eaten lunch!

One last note... Reality Check, Jamie: I'm not single by choice, THERE HAVE BEEN NO GUYS!!!!!

THANK HEAVENS FOR ROOMMATES

Just when you think that you have gotten away with doing or saying something stupid, there's always the roomies there to publicize your moment of embarassment for all the blog readers out there... well, at least this time, I'm not the only one caught with my pants down, staring back stupidly.

To see us "pants-down" please click on the links of my roommates: Gabs, Caroline, and Zairel.

THE *JOYS* OF BEING A COLLEGE STUDENT

You haven't truly experienced college until you go crying all the way down Shattuck out of sheer hunger... that was me today. Class was unbelievably long and the professor is so long-winded that by 6pm, I was so hungry, I was salivating. Thinking about our empty fridge, Gabs and I decided to make it a take-out night. Damn bastardo and the chick in front of us that bought the last cheap whole chicken!!!!! I was so sad! From that restaurant on, I stopped in front of every restaurant checking out the prices and looking for someplace cheap. But the last straw hit when I peered through the Japanese restaurant only to find that out of all the days of the week, they are ONLY closed on Mondays!!!! Guess what day it is today?! MONDAY!!!!!!

Smitti, Jet and Yoshi saved Gabs and me. Though they've long gone back to LA, they have left a piece of their generous heart behind... a nice plate of teriyaki chicken (Albertson's-style). Teriyaki chicken and beef stew was on the menu for tonight... hopefully tomorrow will be better, cuz I sure don't wanna go crying down Shattuck again!

Amy Grant makes me feel good... I grew up with her songs... reminds me of my childhood. As I currently sit here, singing along to her songs, I believe I like her not only for the simple fact that her songs takes me back to my carefree days, but also that her songs give me inspiration and hope. She inspires me with the power of love and gives me the hope that I will one day find my soul mate. I have come to the realization that many of my notions of love have revolved around her songs. I now have this storybook image of what love is supposed to be and I fear that I may be terribly disappointed in the future to find that love isn't always so black and white or crystal clear. Will I be let down when I realize that I may never be "Saved by Love." Will "Love... Find a Way?" Or do I need to "Wise Up" because I'm too naive for my own good?

Only time will tell... but in the meantime, I will continue to enjoy my Amy Grant songs.

(UN)FORGETTABLE QUOTES

I think I had WAY too much fun this weekend... Mudslides, singing like dead cats in the middle of the night, almost dying w/ Elaine in slippers on wet tiles, Gabby falling off the bed, Great Balls of "Ruben," 8 people ... 1 bathroom... fun weekend!

It was a great weekend, but duly hampered by certain events... or rather "quotes."

Someone said something to me the other day, and I know this person didn't mean anything bad by it, but it brings a lot of questions to mind.

Friend: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: [surprised] Uh... no.
Friend: Hmm... I can't imagine you having a boyfriend.

Can't imagine me having a boyfriend... how am I supposed to take that? Is it because I'm too independent of a girl to be w/ someone? Is it because I can't get anyone? What the heck does this mean? Am I doomed to be alone for the rest of my life?!

The second incident happened today when I was walking over to Memorial Glade for the OP get-together. So there I was, carrying all my paperwork stuff and walking briskly cuz I was already horribly late, looking all spiffy and sporty (cuz today was SO hot!) when three hot Abercrombie-looking guys passed by me.

Hot guy: How you doing...
Me: [feeling very flattered and smiles weakly]
Hot guy: ...Shorty...

SHORTY?! Am I that short? As far as I know, this is NOT a term of endearment!!!!!!! Geez, what is wrong with me? I think I shall forever be doomed "girl with clipboard." How un-sexy!!!! There's a wild side to me, I just don't let her come out to play very often... but she does play. Sometimes I wish I could just be a irresponsible, reckless teenager for once without feeling as if I'm going to let down a slew of people. I'm freakin' 19 already... I have less than 5 months before my "teenage years" are over. Yikes!

Tremendous breakthrough today...

My roommate is the female version of Doogie Howser. Please call her Dooga Ventura.

My heart aches whenever I talk to my sister. It's been a long time coming, but I think we finally have a very strong sisterly bond. She finally appreciates all the things I have done for her in the past and she understands why I've been so hard on her for the past 15 years of her life. I'm so proud of her − for taking on so much and pushing herself to the limit... kinda reminds me of myself 3 years ago. Thus, the reason why my heart aches. Journalism has taken up a lot of her time, plus she's taking the same work-load that I did, 3 APs. She's obviously tired all the time and she feels bad cuz she's spread out so thinly that she thinks she can't do anything right. When I talk to her, all the horrors come rushing back to me and I feel as if I'm back in high school, pulling another all nighter to finish a Hofstadter or cramming for another bio exam. Not that high school was a terrible time in my life, but Junior year was just so frustrating for me. I had wished with all my heart that Terri wouldn't have to go through what I went through. But, she's going through it now and I can't do anything to help her. I know that it's normal for Juniors to have to go through so much crap... heck, I went through it. But the big sister in me hopes for nothing more than to be able to protect her from everything. It hurts me so much to hear her struggling that I'd give anything to be able to take some of that stress away from her. I have a really sick feeling in my stomach right now and I can't help the tears from rolling. I think this is what it feels like when your heart breaks...

MARRIED AT 19

Gabs sent me an article last night, long after I had drearily passed out on the couch from the horrendously long day yesterday. (Yesterday was sooo emotionally and physically draining!!) The article kinda scared me... the quote goes something like this: "As Americans are working longer hours and investing emotionally in our jobs, we are simultaneously depleting our lives beyond work ... When work fails — through a betrayal, rupture or layoff — employees who have given it all often find there is nothing to fall back on."

So I don't exactly work a paying job, which means that I'm not in the "employee" category... but I do feel the stress and burdens that Andrea Sachs speaks about. Mark this time... it is currently 10:16pm and I barely starting on my dinner... a sad looking chicken salad. It doesn't help that I'm currently reading Time Bind for Sociology class right now, and all this book talks about are the millions of people who try to avoid family life because they feel burdened by the problems there, so they spend all their time at work to try to escape. Makes me cringe at the thought that I could end up like one of those people. But I'm taking all this in stride... it's a nice slap in the face. I refuse to be one of those moms that end up leaving her kids at some baby-sitter's place, only to see them for a brief half an hour before they go to sleep at night.

What have a learned through all this? Marry a man... not a job. Problem: I gotta establish a social life first, which currently sucks cuz I do so much work... and we're now back at Square 1...

For the whole article by Andrea Sachs entitled "Wedded to Work," Click here.

WAYS TO PICK UP ON GUYS (JAMIE AND GABBY STYLE)

You know how people used to pass notes to each other in class? I used to be SO curious about what tidbit of juicy gossip was being dished around and who would end up being the butt of jokes for the week. Not that I'm a nosy person, but sometimes I'd strategically crane my neck in a certain direction to try to read the passed note.

[flash forward to college-life]

Contrary to popular belief, Gabs is still a better note-passer than Caleb. (Sorry, Caleb, you're just TOO random for me! Sticking your finger up your nose and swirling your brain with it?! Too creepy!) But, I gotta give Caleb some credit... the class is REALLY boring... sooooo boring that all Gabs and I do in class is pass notes to each other. (Poor Paul, he's always sitting inbetween us...) Lately, I've noticed that people around us have tried to crane their necks in an attempt to read the things that we giggle about in class. Well, Gabs and I have upped the antes in the skill of note-passing... we have incorporated ways to pick up on guys through our notes! To get the attention of this one dude sitting behind us, I wrote really big, "CURLY-HAIRED MAN, SHE DIGS YOU!" Gabs shot back with an equally large font message, "JAMIE, JUST TELL THE GUY SITTING NEXT TO YOU THAT YOU THINK HE'S HOT!

Gabs and Jamie, Love Attorneys at your service....

HEALTH WAIVER WHA?!??!!?

Total roomie moment last night w/ Zairel... simple question taken to the extreme...

Zairel: Hey, are you under the school health insurance?
Me: Nope, covered by my mom's insurance company.
Zairel: Well, what do you do if you need to see a dentist?
Me: I go to my regular dentist, he's a family friend.
Zairel: So you've gone to him all your life?
Me: No, there was this one point in my life that I was scared of him, so I went to a children-friendly dentist, where the clinic was equipped w/ toys and video games.

[This is where the conversation takes a detour into Zimbabwe.]

Me: I used to be scared of old men. I used to cry whenever I saw my childhood best friend's (Alex) dad. Whenever we had to go visit, he would try to make faces to make me laugh but I'd just cry even harder. Even to this day, when we go visit, Alex still makes fun of me. But that's okay, I make fun of him, too. He used to have a poo-poo problem.

[both giggles]

Zairel: When I was younger, I used to hate visiting this one family friend. He used to pinch my cheeks so hard that it would make me want to cry... but I wouldn't cry because I didn't want to show weakness. I would do everything to try to avoid him, like tiptoe in from the side.

[more giggling]

Zairel: Ooh, and then there was Grandma Sandoval and her dog. She had this extra loose skin next to her eye that used to scare me... and her dog with only one good eye...

[shudders]

Totally random convo about health care, dentists, poo-poo problems, loose eye skin and blind dogs.... go figure!

Rant AND Rave of the Day: I ran into Jerry on the bus today and ended up going over to see his place... freakin' looks like a apt. in Hollywood. Very modern looking! And then there's us w/ our 50s' sea-green oven. Life is soooo not fair!

... UGH... SO FULL!!!!!

Thoughts of chocolate smeared all over my face, SFAutumn Moon Festival, Salvadoran Independence day, love-making to sea-lions, "Chester" hunting, 11-egg omelet, banana split, Peter wearing women's panties... 4 guys, 2 girls, the sky's the limit....

Read Gabby's Blog for the extended version of what happened yesterday.

GROCERY SHOPPING ON A FRIDAY NIGHT...

Is it pathetic to do my shopping on a Friday night when most other people my age are out partying and drinking? Well... I don't really mind, cuz last night, Gabs and I ran into some hot guys at Safeway (not to mention the two hot guys we were accompanied by). We managed to save over $40 with a FREE Safeway Club Card. (I don't get it, why would anybody NOT have a club card?! It doesn't even cost anything to apply for one!) Petey picked out a huge honking package of Hickory roasted bacon which we fried up this morning. (Gabs' heart murmur has returned... good thing we live across the street from the Alta Bates Hospital!)

Call it a defense mechanism, if you will... but instead of facing reality, I've tried to block out everything about yesterday, just tried to live it like any other day. I haven't read any of the articles that Time has written about the incident and I refuse to watch any of the commemorative TV specials that have been playing all week long. I attemptedy to watch some of the clips that they played on TV yesterday morning... but Gabs shut it off before I could be drawn into anything. Am I cold-hearted? I don't think so....

In essence, I have paralleled what the rest of America has done all year. It doesn't change anything to be good for one day out of the year if for the other 364 days, we keep on living as if the attacks of Sept. 11th never made a difference in our lives. Looking back on the year, there hasn't been any momentous changes in how society goes about on their daily lives. Our pop culture certainly didn't seem to change. Britney Spears decides to come out with a snake and sing about being "A Slave for U," Mariah Carey breaks out from her singing career to do a movie called "Glitter," and scandals still run rampant among movie stars alike... good-bye to Tom and Nicole, hello to Harrison and Calista. Sounds trival right now, but people having been buying into the consumer hype all year. I think more people watched the finale of American Idol than the 9-11 special on NBC yesterday morning. Magazines like Time do their weekly updates on "Where is Osama?" but nothing ever changes. For all we know, he's probably still running around the Al-Qaeda mountains but whether or not we catch him won't be the end all to terrorism. It doesn't erase the fact that stuff like this happens to other countries all the itme. Don't get me wrong, I don't blame America for what happened. I'm perhaps one of the most patriotic people you'll ever meet (Girls' State will do that to ya!) but at the same time, quoting Chancellor Berdahl, "There have been too many words said, it's time for action..."

I LOVE ZACK MORRIS!

Luis is THE BEST!!!! I am now a proud owner of the wonderful t-shirt I wanted from Alloy... I will wear it proudly. *bows*

We now have cable internet and cable TV! (Gabs and Zairel were working it this morning... I told you the outfit would work, Gabs!)

MISHAP IN THE BATHROOM

In my attempt to be a nice person and do my good deed of the day, I tried to dry a couple of Gabby's shirts... the result? A good deed gone very wrong. I managed to bring the whole shower curtain down, crushing me underneath it, still trying to do a balancing act with the shower curtain hooks. Needless to say, the bathroom looked like a war zone for a split second, but all is well now... for the time being... until I decide to do another good deed....

As if that wasn't bad enough, at the last moment, I decided to wash my dark blue jeans with my "light blue to white" load of laundry. Such a terrible mistake!!!!! My Star Buddy is now filled with streaks of blue! Pink star pillow with blue streaks... NOT a good combination! Sorry Ben... it looks like your best friend of first semester might have to go into retirement... *sigh*

Quotes worth recording from Uncle Vania by Anton Chekhov:

"A woman can only become a man's friend in three stages: first, she's an agreeable acquaintance, then a mistress, and only after that a friend."

"She's beautiful, there's no denying that, but... she does nothing but eat, sleep, go for walks, charm us all by her beauty... nothing else. She has no responsibilities, other people work for her... Isn't that so? And an idle life can't be virtuous."

"... ignorance is better... At least there's some hope..."

BOOBIES, BOOBIES, BOOBIES

Once again, I must record Gabby's daily comments... Direct quote: "Sorry, the boobies are staying in, they will not come out to play tonight." Berkeley sure has changed her!!!!! =O

I rode the buses all around Lake Merritt with Deanna today for a Sociology project. It was quite interesting... some random black guy slid into the seat right behind me on the bus and got so close that Deanna thought he had kissed my hair!!!! Then he asked us, "How you ladies doooing?" He concluded his act by serenading us with a brief rendition of "To Live and Die in LA" before he jumped off the bus.

Gabs says I'm gonna die young... I say, I only live once, gotta live it up! Meat is good... and I'm a growing girl. I had waaaaay too many strips of bacon this morning and then finished off the day with steak for dinner. George Foreman is my friend.

*sigh* My Best Friend's Wedding... such a sad movie. I watch every time with the hope that the ending will change... but it never does. Julianne Potter (Julia Roberts) never gets the man of her dreams... hmm, sounds vaguely familiar. I admire her for realizing that she will never be the girl that her dream man desires. But this only leads me to wonder about my own life... will my future be played out like a movie? Will I be doomed to an eternity of anticipation for a writer's edit, only to find that the conclusion has been etched in stone... resulting in me walking away with the consolation prize: a comforting shoulder of a gay friend? How does one overcome the inevitable heartbreak that ensues? How does one let go?

Sidenote: Dodgers play the Giants tomorrow night... true to my roots, Go Dodgers!!!!!! Gagne's gonna strike out Barry Bonds...

FOOD AND FOOTBALL

Sometimes I swear I live a man's lifestyle.... I have done nothing at all since I woke up this morning but eat and watch football. (Yay! Cal is currently up by 7!) I DID manage to read a couple of chapters from my Dance Studies Reader. Hahha, people who see me reading the book always ask if I'm a dancer. I'm so far from it!!!!!! The book actually talks about HOW TO ANALYZE dance, rather than HOW TO dance.

I also got the update on the family this morning from my mom. We talked for a really long time. Terri has already given her several heart attacks with her reckless driving. (Ack! My Diamante!!!!!) She was also complaining today about the extended period of Preseason. Good ol' Mr. Narumi, still working the band! =) Jerry has a new basketball coach, supposedly a really good player. They started GEO league today, I hope his team wins! Other than that, the family's doing well, which makes me happy. My mom was kinda afraid to ask how we've been eating lately. I was actually the one that brought up the subject and she was glad to hear that we have been using the rice cooker. My dad was also happy to hear that we went to see Mamma Mia last night. Technically, he didn't know about Mamma Mia, but one simple mention about ABBA and he was contented.

Now I go to watch more Cal football... yes! We're up by 14!

"MAMMA MIA, HERE I GO AGAIN..."

Quite the expensive night, but DEFINITELY worth every penny. Our first roomie outing... watched Mamma Mia. We all got dressed up and looked so super hot that we had to fight off gawking men from our apartment all the way to the Civic Center. =) *Random comment... Brian Gamido lives right down the street from us!* The show was REALLY good. I love ABBA songs, thanks to my parents. Awesome singing and dancing! (But not nearly as good as Caroline's own private rendition of the musical.)

Bad moment of the night: I got railroad-ed in the bathroom!!! I was the 4th person in line for the restrooms and I happened to lean out of line to toss a Fruit and Nut bar wrapper in the trash can when this bastard of a lady at the front of the line completely shoves me out of the way and rudely says, "Excuuuuuse ME!!!!!" as if I had done something wrong! She had thought that I was going to cut in front of her. Geez, what did she think I was going to do, race her into the stall?! I've got manners!!!! People can be so mean! She didn't have to shove me!

Correction: Zairel claims that I "misquoted" her, but it was, rather, a lack to quote. Zairel is the one that came up with, "Excuse me, my ladybug is down," not Gabs. Just making sure that Zairel gets her due respect for the "quirky" saying... Girl, you can HAVE the credit for THAT one!

Ugh... now I must go digest the 1/3 of a pound of beef that I had of dinner from Mels. Yum... so full....

GABBY'S COMMENTS FOR THE DAY

1. "A man's penis is God's gift to women."
2. "Excuse me, my ladybug is down."

RANDOM LABOR DAY WEEKEND

Once again, I waited for Gabs' to sum up the weekend... all I can say is that it was a very strange and random weekend, but definitely lots of fun! So (once again...) read her blog. If you don't know the link by now... TOO BAD!!!! (Relax, just scroll down.) *I feel like I'm Gabby's blog-endorser.*

I CAN blog about my strange dream last night... I dreamt that I was being attacked by a large and oversized headrest and there was no getting around it. I tried to jump over it, run around it, even duck underneath it, but each time, the giant headrest was wise to my attempts and got me. I wonder what it means... no doubt it had something to do with large, pubic-hair covered, carcass-looking thing we found by the bus stop.

See? Very random weekend....