At the risk of sounding like a washed-up has-been in the world of High School Speech and Debate, may I just say... I'VE MISSED IT SO MUCH!

I have a midterm in less than 5 hours... which I probably should still be studying for, but instead, I've been sitting in my chair, getting more and more excited by the second, about the mock lesson plan I have prepared for my Teach for America interview on Wednesday!!!!

I'll divulge my lesson plan post-interview. This idea is SOOO good that it warrants the level of secrecy I'm keeping it at. All I can say is that it's very "expository-like," which was the event that I actually competed in back in high school... and LOVED. (Okay, I loved Original Oratory, too.) There's something about expos-ers... or rather, TRUE O.G. expos-ers (not the ones from Arcadia). They've all got a sense of flair to them. So in true Expos-fashion, I will teach by making learning FUN! OooOOohh, this is going to be so GREAT! Thank you, NFL and Tony (no, not football, National Forensics League!) for fostering these great talents in me.

MY PAST AND MY PRESENT

The NBA has changed so much this season that I hardly recognize any of the teams anymore. The teams I used to root for are no longer the same, leaving me very conflicted. For instance, I used to love the Heat. I loved that my Eddie Jones was finally finding his niche with the team (even though I'll always consider him a Laker) and the running game he had alongside Lamar Odom and Dwyane Wade. But now, Lamar is with the Lakers (yay!) and the Heat have picked up Shaq (boo!) How can I possibly, in my right mind, root for a team with that fat crybaby??? And yet, I have nothing but love for Eddie and Dwyane. Those two deserve to have a good season... I just wish Shaq didn't have to be in the picture for that one.

But to complicate matters, tonight was a real toughie. The Heat played against the Spurs... and we all know that after Derek Fisher hit that 0.4-second shot in the playoffs last year against the Spurs, it fueled an even stronger Lakers/Spurs rivalry. (In actuality, I think the rivalry is really between Shaq and Duncan.) So it's also really hard for me to root for the Spurs, even though I think Manu Ginobili is such a BALLER! I couldn't decide who I wanted to win more tonight - Eddie or Manu... so I left it up to the Basketball Gods.

But what happens when the Basketball Gods decide to torture me by making me choose my past or my present... my past being Grant Hill and my present being Kobe Bryant. Grant Hill was my favorite player since his first season in 1994, when he shared the Rookie of the Year award with Jason Kidd. But when Kobe stepped into the basketball limelight in 1996, it's been Kobe the whole way.



My Lakers lost tonight... at the hands of Grant Hill. With less than 2 minutes left, Hill dropped two 3-pointers to put the game away. Against any other team, I'd be f.cking THRILLED! This poor guy has had soooo many ankle problems and surgeries to try to fix it all. He's basically been MIA for the past four years, but all of a sudden, he's making one heck of a comeback. Unfortunately, tonight, it was at the expense of my Lakers. Not cool. At least Kobe dropped 41 and taught young Dwight Howard a little lesson - to get out of the way when you see Kobe fly.



Said Kobe about Hill, "It's great to see him out there. It really is. He's always been a guy I looked at and patterned my game after, even when he was at Duke. I've been a fan of Grant Hill's for a long, long time." Oh, the irony.

ONLY IN BERKELEY...

I was waiting at an intersection on my way to campus today when I had a very strange encounter. I happened, for no apparent reason, to be singing "I Can See Clearly" and just minding my own business. The light was taking a really long time to change in order for me to walk across the street... so I kept singing. This old lady stepped up behind me and she turned to stare at me. So I politely smiled at her. All of a sudden, she grabs my face and pulls it close to her - so close that I can smell her breath - and gives me the coldest, scariest look and asks in a fierce whisper, "DO I LOOK DAMAGED TO YOU?" By this time, I'm a bit bewildered by the whole "up close and personal" encounter that I stare dazed at her for a couple seconds before I finally regain my voice to shake my head furiously to say, "No... no... you look... fine... " The light changes and I try to escape by crossing the street. This lady, given her old age, kept up with me pretty well. She walks right beside me and demands, "LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT ME!!!" And she pulls my face, again, towards hers and uses her other hand to point towards her eyes. For a brief second, I got so scared and my body turned cold. For a girl that did a lot of research on dark magic in high school, I totally believe in hexes and was very afraid that's what this lady was doing. I managed to break away from the deep stare and half run and skip down Telegraph with the crazy woman still calling out after me, "LOOK AT ME! I'VE BEEN DAMAGED!!!"

Okay, so what's the point, right? Well, lately, I've been reading a lot about issues dealing with poverty and homelessness. Just yesterday, I had a conversation with Caroline about how horrible the policies on deinstitutionalization have impacted the mentally ill. The mentally ill currently make up a large portion of the homeless. Furthermore, society's tolerance level of what is considered "crazy" has risen. As such, people who REALLY need help haven't necessarily received it. And part of the reason is because states keep closing mental hospitals and relying on federal support, which has been very meager. I know that the way I handled the situation today wasn't very tactful or sensitive. I think that lady really needs some psychological help (but then again, I think we all do, to some degree). And instead of trying to help, I ran the other direction as if my pants were on fire. Great... good job, Jamie. Social problems stare me in the face, and I just continue to ADD to the problem. What good is a Berkeley degree if I haven't even learned anything about social responsibilities? Hopefully others would have been the better person if faced with my situation today.

This is so frustrating...

I'm so sick of certain people in positions of authority this year trying to take credit of the things that I started last year! (For the sake of anonymity, I will avoid using names.) They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery - that is, to imitate someone is to pay the person a genuine compliment. In that sense, I feel very proud that some of the things that I have started has had such a continuous force. But for crying out loud, GIVE CREDIT WHERE DUE! Don't STEAL my words and pass it off as yours! Don't rob my ideas and spread them around as if you created them. My only mistake was never taking credit for the all the work that I have done. I'd venture to even say that 85% of student life last year passed through my hands, either directly or indirectly, in some shape or form. But nobody would believe me anyway, since I never really talk about all the things that happen in a day... there just isn't enough time in a day to regurgitate the decisions and choices and influences I have made. Yes, it's true, I make things seem easier than they really are and I try as hard as possible to diminish the roles that I have played. Even my resume is a very watered down reflection of myself. Why? Cuz I don't believe in chasing after glory like some power-driven pig, which is why you will never find a laundry list of things I did last year written down anywhere. The only place where it exists is in my head. It'll blow your mind if you ever saw what's up there. But it isn't even WHAT I did, but HOW I did it. What I believe is that the work I do speaks for itself. And sadly, there is only but one person in this whole entire world that will ever truly know and understand. Nobody else ever will... so don't speak, cuz YOU JUST DON'T KNOW. But does it matter anyway? Will anybody ever understand to what extent I gave myself? How do you explain the endless hours? The sleepless nights? How do you measure the work done in a year? By the number of events? By the success of the event?... I'd like to think it's by the number of lives you touch.

A weaker person would've be broken after doing what I have done. All I ask is for a bit of appreciation... and yet you continue to act like a privileged spoiled brat.

Whoa... how silly am I??? I KNOW an international basketball superstar and didn't even realize it! I sat next to a tall, handsome guy in class today. This guy and I know each other as acquaintances from class and often exchange "hellos" in passing.

This guy is:



Randy Duck, former captain of the Brighton Bears, a basketball team from London. How trippy is that? Fun fact: He also used to play for Cal a couple of years ago. My friend told me that he used to really enjoy watching him play... which is what tipped me off if the first place.

Pure genius. Nelly and Tim McGraw in a duet, how PERFECT is that?! My two favorite genres of music meet together in my NEW favorite song, "Over and Over." Why didn't anybody else think of this before???

I keep hoping to wake up from this horrible nightmare. Yet sadly, this is the reality... another four years of hell. My faith in humanity is currently being re-evaluated. I don't understand how 51% of the voting population can be so stupid. I'd leave the country, but my father has already forbid me from emigrating.